“I gave in, and admitted that God was God.” C. S. Lewis
“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the LORD. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” Isaiah 55:8-9
“The heart of man plans his way, but the LORD establishes his steps.” Proverbs 16:9
“Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the LORD that will stand.” Proverbs 19:21
A huge gust of wind came, bringing with it a bitter cold chill that ran through my body. Also coming with it, a huge cloud of dust…right into my face. I tried to turn against it, but then I couldn’t see. Seriously, why fix your hair? The wind is just going to blow it into a tangled mess anyway. Another huge gust of wind came. I clutched my fists against it, as if by my sheer will power I could stop it from blowing. It’s the WIND for crying out loud. Nothing I could ever do could stop the wind from blowing. It just blows because that is what it was purposed to do.
Then God gently reminded me that He is like the wind, and that so many times I clench my fist against Him and His will. As if by will power I could change Him or His purposes. He reminded me that the wind is often necessary. It brings change in the weather, carries seeds to far off places, blows away the rain clouds, or clears the sky so the sun can shine. The wind can also bring dust, mighty storm clouds, fierce gales, rough waves, and dark clouds that cover the sun. Like the wind, God’s spirit moves to and fro and also brings change, some good and some bad, but all necessary to accomplish His purpose. So many times the movement of the Spirit brings a change that blows through me–sending a chill, or some pain, or joy through my heart. Sometimes, I get dirt all over my soul trying to fight it. I try to turn against it, but then I cannot find my way. I try to fix myself up and make my heart look pretty. But I can’t do it myself and I pray for the change to stop. I clench my fists against His “wind” as if by my sheer will power I can stop it (He’s God for crying out loud!). Nothing I could ever do could stop the will of God. It happens…because He’s God. And because He is God, I can trust that He is good and does good (Ps. 90:68) no matter what I may think. He speaks into my life and says,
“Daughter, why are you clenching your fists? Why are you fighting? Let go and be swept away by My Spirit. It won’t always be safe. No, there will be times when it is rough, and you get battered by the storms of life. There will be times when that heart of yours that you tried to make look so pretty will be broken. There will be times when you will be taken into the depths of the valley. But in all this, there will also be times that you will soar like the eagle among the heights. There will be times that you will run with Me on the mountains. But no matter what may come, whether happy and safe or sad and helpless…you are being swept away by Me, the God of the Universe. And you will be used to accomplish My good will. So, trust Me in the harsh winds of winter and the cool breezes of summer because I created both for My glory.”
As the wind continued to blow, I realized the sky was clear and all the dust in the air from the day before was getting swept away from the clear, blue sky. Even though the wind was kicking up dust, it was also clearing off the winter skies to make room for spring. In that moment, I was thankful for the wind and all of its chaos. My hair was a mess and I still couldn’t see, but I knew that change was coming. And it was good.
About the Author
I’m a single, 33 year old, ordinary girl loved by an extraordinary God. I am an OK State and SWBTS alum. I am currently serving the Lord in California and helping co-direct a non-profit for refugee women called Himalayas By Hand. I love Jesus, the Oakland A’s, the OSU Cowboys, refugees, football, Needtobreathe, and other awesome things. I’m a small town girl with big city dreams just trying to love God more and love others more. You can find me on Twitter: @brookonthemove or @himalayasbyhand.